One year ago today i set out to New Zealand
It’s strange the way time works. I was explaining to a friend that it will be a year since going there, and they replied, “only one year? feels like forever ago”. I quickly said “no..it feels like yesterday”. This made me realize the way time operates..and well..the world. Time isn’t some absolute measurement. It is solely defined by our memories, our love, our loss, our highs, our lows. And we all go on living in our own time, our own universe. And no one else can see your clock because in place of numbers are your joy, your love, your hurt. But sometimes, you find someone who can see your clock..and you see theirs. And then your clocks tick together to the beat of the universe. But when we lose those people we try to turn back the clock..i know..i know. And all your memories still quietly whisper to me.
This year has been hard..and although the clock doesn’t turn back..i know that it comes back ‘round again.
To the one i have loved and lost. I hope you are well. I hope you are forever strong. I hope you are forever loved.
Looking back, what hit me the most about LOST was this idea of ‘moments’. That we all have had a time in our lives that we look back on as being ‘the days to remember’; where we found joy, found love, found ourselves. The time that most would give anything to get back to; to feel what was felt then. For everyone its something different, some days, some months, some years. However they are one in the same: Always Natural. Always Beautiful. Just as Jack was screaming to get back to the island we scream to get back to these defining moments. So we go on, honoring these ‘days to remember’, because all memories should be honored. However, human nature drives us to one fatal mistake. We attempt to force these moments again in a state of delusion and longing, we try to bring back our past joy, our past love. Here in lies the problem. These…moments in our lives…they are not able to be forced or willed; they will not bend to human desire. Ironically, this is exactly why they are so special to us. We are only given so much time with them. And all of our attempts to “go back” only hinder future moments. We must choose to let go. Choose to open our souls. Choose to open our minds. But most importantly, choose to open the door to our hearts, because we may just find more beautiful moments have been waiting to come in, all along.
-whatisfildoing
“and when someone else loves me i hope it’s someone like you”
The bittersweet between my teeth
Trying to find the in-betweens
Fall back in love eventually
I’m a new day rising
Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force. Mourn them, do not. Miss them, do not. Attachment leads to jealousy. The shadow of greed, that is. Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose.
Well there was a time when you let me know
what’s really going on below
but now you never show that to me do you
but remember when I moved in you
and the holy dove was moving too
and every breath we drew was hallelujah
Just messing around/missing lost
“Pieces”
“I had a thing for a girl once and I had a shot at her but I didn’t take it. For a little while I’d lie in bed every night wondering if it was a mistake. Wondering… if I’d ever stop thinking about her, but now I can barely remember what she looks like. And her face is… she’s just gone. And she ain’t ever coming back.” - Sawyer
The leaves of memory seemed to make
A mournful rustling in the dark.
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow